Have had to stop knitting. I managed to finish the project I was on, which is a pair of mittens with owls on the back for YD. They look really nice, and are knitted in merino, silk and cashmere, so they’re very soft and should be very warm. It was fabulous to knit with.

However, it’s a big downer to have had to stop. I was aware that I might not be able to do any more projects, but was hoping with better pain control I could carry on. But no. And the pain, despite no more knitting, is still dreadful. Doctor’s on Wednesday.

I think it’s probably the pain that’s making me feel so low, too. I’m trying not to be a miserable old baggage, but am afraid that is exactly what I am. So I’m trying to regain at least some sort of control over my life/emotions. I’ve put away neatly all the knitting stuff. I’ve nearly finished Christmas shopping – only two more presents to go. I’ve ordered new egg-box (ripple) mattress toppers for us both, and a fancy pillow for me, as I’m struggling to get comfortable at night. It does give me a feeling of control, even if that’s not completely true.

And of course I just need to wait for my operation. It should be beginning of March 2013 at the latest, but then there’s a 3 – 4 month recuperation – according to the consultant, and they do tend to minimise such things, so it could even be longer.

Plenty of things to do in the meantime. Crosswords, reading, the extremely easy Pilates class I’ve started going to. And of course plenty of sleeping.

This week I have three medical appointments. One is for Vic, but I need to drive him as he will have a numb foot when they’ve finished. One for the doctor, for me, and one for the foot people for me on Thursday. And I’m just not going to book anything else in at all because I’m knackered.

I’m not actually in tears all the time, but pretty close to it some of the time. What fun for hubby to live with, but he’s very good and kind and patient. Thank goodness. What would I do without him?

And to finish, here’s a photo of a spider’s web on my car. I think the spider lives in my wing mirror, and has the patience of Job, because the web gets wrecked every time I drive.