health

Where to start!

/ Loony Feminist / 1 Comment

Been back from New Zealand over a month now and life had pretty much settled back to normal. Until The Apocalypse (Covid-19) arrived. Bleugh.

I don’t understand why people would buy ALL the toilet rolls and ALL the pasta. What about everybody else, dickheads?? Huh?

Hubby and I are not self-isolating yet but we are “distancing” socially. It was my sister’s birthday yesterday, and we were actually in the same room! but didn’t hug. Hmm. It’s sensible, just a bit sad. So we bumped elbows instead. I won’t catch public transport or go anywhere too crowded (not that anywhere is at the moment!)

Although Hubby, bless him, went to a concert at Symphony Hall last night. On public transport. And bought a Big Issue (which I won’t touch and is now in the recycling. I usually do buy it, but not at the moment!) Sigh. He’s 74, with a heart condition. We did talk about it but he’s a grown up. Hmm.

But then I have a hair appointment tomorrow. Just hoping the hairdresser people all wear plastic gloves. I expect they will. They’d better not breathe on me either. Joking. (sort of).

Been catching up on “inside” jobs, although managed to do an hour’s gardening last week, which was lovely. I just cut back all the ugly dead stuff and did a very small bit of weeding. Now the daffodils are centre stage and look lovely. I’m absolutely knackered, of course, but happy.

And this morning I sorted out all the stuff from Mother’s house which is going to eBay/Freecycle/charity shop. A very small proportion has been bought on eBay, the rest is charity shop/Freecycle. So boxes have been reorganised and there are lots more boxes in the hall, far fewer in the study! Also went through two boxes of framed photos, sorted the frames into charity shop/tip (refuse centre), and kept all the photos.

Just to give you a small idea of a fraction of the stuff. There have been umpteen (probably 100) visits to charity shops. We have filled two medium size skips, and will probably fill another one. But Mother’s house is looking better now.  Bigger. She was a bit of an “accumulator” and there was stuff just everywhere.

Next up – sort ALL the photos (boxfuls) into some sort of order. I have the box, I have the photos, and an idea of how I’m going to do it. Just need to wait for the energy to do it . . . in the plan is also writing on the back who is who, if  it’s not already done. My sister and I are the last people on this side of this family who will have any chance of identifying people, and it’s just so useful when looking through old photos to know. Instead of gazing blankly at strangers,  there are”ohs” of recognition as realisation dawns. It’s history. Family history. Yeah. Dad was born in 1920, and there are photos of his parents, the (very) odd aunt, and so on. Just the clothes are interesting.

And then there are hundreds of transparencies to go through. Hundreds. There is a slide projector which of course I haven’t the faintest idea how to use, but that will be another little job. Learn to use the slide projector. Learn how to load the slides into the cartridges. Learn how to identify which slide is actually showing at any one time. I may need to set aside some time for that . . . .

Woke late this morning, unsurprisingly. Feeling ok though, but I am aware I’ve done enough.  Hence sitting blogging.

Managing.

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Writing is supposed to be cathartic so I thought I’d jot down a few notes about how I manage the depression and M.E.

Went to the osteopath today because I was in some pain. It’s part of the maintenance and upkeep. As usual after the osteopath I’m pretty low tonight and on the verge of tears. Taking regular painkillers. Can’t take Brufen because of my asthma. Big old bummer, because they are such effective painkillers. I can take Cocodamol though, and am at the doctor’s next week so might mention it then.

However I re-arranged the pedicure, which was going to be tomorrow, and have cried off the knitting get together tonight. Will see if I am able to get to the sewing course on Saturday – I’d really like to go, because it’s making a Japanese Knot Bag and matching purse, but if I’m not up to it, then I’m just not.

Such decisions sound a bit sad, but in fact once I’ve decided that I need to cancel stuff, I actually feel a bit better about things. Not exactly in control of my health, just managing it better. I don’t like to feel that it’s managing me. Even though it probably is. Mm.

I’ve been sleeping a lot. Most of Tuesday. Managed to have a shower and wash my hair on Wednesday. Then had a half hour sit down, and did my ironing. I do it every week, and hubby does his own, so it only takes about 25 minutes maximum. Then lunch, and then did the online shop. So quite a lot achieved yesterday. But the afternoon sleeps are long. At least three hours, sometimes four. Then I sleep all night too.

Might consider a bath and face pack tomorrow. Will see how I wake up. I very, very rarely have a bath. We have some nice bubble bath though and it does help relax my back.

I have two go-to authors whose books I read when I feel like this. Bill Bryson, who is just one of my favourite writers, and Tom Cox. Ditto. Can’t help smiling as I read their stuff.

Retail therapy always helps too, so have ordered a couple of tops (reduced) from Warehouse. Two different colours, and two different sizes, so we shall see if I like the colours and if they fit.

Hubby is off to a meeting tonight so I shall watch some crappy tv. No knitting mojo at all at the moment, and booked in for steroid injections into the knuckles of my right hand on Monday. Will see how things go after that.

Christmas almost organised. Thank goodness for the internet. A bit of baking to do, but nothing major. Last year I did a Yule Log which is fat free, therefore dairy free. It was delicious and both hubby and I liked it, which is a bonus. He doesn’t like fruit cake so if I made a proper Christmas cake I’d just eat it all and put on loads of weight. And am going to do some mince pies only in filo pastry as I have some in the freezer. Everybody else can eat normal ones from the shop, but the dairy free ones from the shop tend to be cheap and nasty.

“interesting times”

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Well, in the UK, at least.

I’ve been trying not to get too depressed about the news, but today I was cheered up a little because Scotland’s highest civil court has ruled the suspension of Parliament unlawful. There will be an appeal next week but fingers crossed.

It’s “interesting” because we’re just watching a series on TV about the rise of the Nazis, and we’ve just got to 1933, when government simply got rid of all the inconvenient checks and balances and took over the police, the press, anything that got in their way. As I’m of Jewish heritage (from my dad and his family) I am particularly interested in this stuff.

Anyway, anyway. Did a bit of gardening yesterday – hubby got out the electric handsaw and pruned some very over-exuberant shrubs, I picked up the debris, cut it smaller, and put it in our green wheelie bin. Which, I may say, is now full to bursting.

Today went to the hospital for my eyes to be checked. Tomorrow off to the osteopath. And all last week was not at all well with an infection which actually needed antibiotics. A three day course and I’m much better now, if somewhat thinner. (no, not D & V! I just don’t eat when I’m ill).

Managed a bit of knitting, finally, and it’s a toy, so small pieces. Quite satisfying really.

Just drinking a very welcome cup of tea after my afternoon sleep and then I’ll do the shopping list. We have it delivered so it’s “do the list, log in, order it all, and wait for them to arrive”. Excellent. Much better now we have broadband. In the early days with a dial-up connection (remember those?) the whole thing would crash half way through an order. Very frustrating.

 

Miscellany

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Things have calmed down a little.

The garden is beautiful at the moment, and the sun is currently shining.

Went to the knitting group on Thursday with my friend, who isn’t often able to come, so that was really nice. Finished off a small project, but as it’s a gift no photo yet.

The cat came limping up the garden yesterday on three legs, with one leg held high, up by her face. Both hubby and I thought she was seriously injured, until I got up close to her and discovered one paw was stuck through her collar. Easily sorted and no harm done. Really not sure how she managed that though.

Watching the Women’s Football World Cup – it’s just so exciting. Last night’s match, France v USA, was really good. Can’t knit while watching football, though, too fraught.

In fact, not knitting for a few days now because of a swollen and sore knuckle. It’s settling now I’m resting it.

And I’m resting everything today, because the temperature is set to soar. Not as high as in France or Spain, because, well, Britain, but high for us. Anything over about 24C and I’m lounging around drinking cold water in my pjs.

Re-reading Song of Achilles – at the time I was really struck by it and loved it. But re-reading it I have absolutely no recollection of it. Also reading Siege by Michael Wolff. Dynamite. Really enjoyed Fire and Fury too.

A Bit Overwhelmed

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Slightly fraught at the moment.

The tooth which has been hurting, a lot, since December, was extracted today. I currently have no feeling in one half of my face, but that means there’s no pain at the moment. So that’s good then.

I went to the funeral last week for my ex-husband’s mother. Sad but nice at the same time. She was 99.

There is a possibility that one of my favourite people may be moving a very long way away. As far away as one can get, in fact.

One of the most difficult relationships in my life has just got much worse, partly because the other party screamed (yes, screamed) at me the other day. I didn’t scream back though. But am not happy.

My blood pressure is a bit odd at the moment. Unsurprisingly, I guess.

But I’m sure it will all turn out ok in the end. I have no brain space for anything else at all.

And the garden is lovely. The weather is lovely. Hubby is lovely. And my French friends are coming over and we will see them this weekend.

Frustrating few days

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First of all, Happy International Women’s Day!

The Procion dye arrived, and I dyed three tops, and it worked really, really well. No mess, no blotchiness, no dye everywhere. One top has a small hole in it so it’s going to the charity shop. I put another one on today and within five minutes managed to get a black smudge on it, so it’s in the wash. Hey ho.

Had an email from Royal Mail to say a parcel would arrive on Wednesday. No parcel. Still. Went round the very frustrating loop on the internet, clicking on links they’d sent me, and the parcel was clearly at the local office. Even downloaded their stupid app, which wouldn’t let me log in to it, although I could log in with exactly the same details on tinterweb.

Eventually, today, I phoned up. What an absolute nightmare. I spent 25 minutes holding on for a proper, real, live person, who (thank goodness) was really helpful, and explained that there had been a strike at that particular office, but they were all back at work now, and not to worry. The parcel will be officially counted as “missing” next Friday, so then I have to get in touch with the senders, who have to claim, then eventually they refund me. However, this particular parcel is for part of a birthday present, so there is a time constraint for me. I’m just really hoping it arrives, because there’s a whole world of bother otherwise.

Spent yesterday morning comprehensively failing to crochet an Amigurumi toy.  It was too small, too fiddly, the yarn was splitty, and although I can crochet in a basic sort of a way (blankets, granny squares), I’m hopeless at shaping. The stitch count goes to buggery as soon as I’ve finished increasing. Every time. Why? anyhow, have decided that bigger Amigurumi toys work better for me. I’ve done a couple of Olafs, and they’ve been fine. Meanwhile, will stick to the blanket I’m doing, and knitting the top for hubby.

On the upside, two tops from John Lewis arrived. I’d ordered a brown one and a yellow one, in two different sizes. The brown one, surprisingly, doesn’t look very nice at all. I think it’s because it has a round neck, which isn’t a great look at almost 64. The yellow, however, looks great! and it’s a bit of a departure for me colour-wise. Years ago I had a top in a very similar yellow and loved it. Mm. So the size that doesn’t fit, and the two brown ones, are going back. Yeah.

Also, have discovered that I’ve lost some weight. I only got on the scales because my clothes were feeling a bit big. And I’ve lost 10 lbs in the last 3 – 4 months. Now, I have given up biscuits (work of the devil, have to have at least 3 at a time) altogether, stopped eating crap in between meals (not literal crap, obviously, just sweets and chocolate) and reduced my sugar intake by at least two thirds (I was eating way, way more than 30g a day). So it could just be that. The osteopath said I need to mention it to the doctor though, and I am having some bloods done next week for a routine checkup (on the NHS of course). We shall see. I feel ok, if more tired than usual. And today I’m treating myself to a whole ciabatta roll, warm, with cheese and Marmite for lunch.

Watched Leaving Neverland yesterday. Oh. My. Days. Not sure what to say about that. MJ was clearly a very disturbed, lonely individual. With a child’s emotional development (or lack of) inside a man’s body. And how many lives have been wrecked. And how are we supposed to feel about his incredible talent now? he could sing, and dance, and how. But all that surgery. The chemical straightening of the hair. The skin lightening stuff. Mm.

 

This and that.

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Well. The sinus infection has eased somewhat, but not gone away. Face still swollen, still painful but not as bad (well, not all the time anyway). Back to the doctor’s on Monday.

Meanwhile, here is what I’ve been doing craft-wise. The new vest for hubby (grey) which is much easier to knit, and another crochet blanket with more free yarn (pink). I frogged the old vest for hubby back to zero and started again. Needed to do two gauge swatches, and am knitting on size 5mm needles. I’m enjoying knitting it, and the crochet blanket is fun to do as well. Different pattern from the other one. It’s for practice, and I’m feeling better about it each time I start a new thing.

Today is YD’s birthday. 35. I can’t believe it. She wasn’t actually born until 19.10, but still. She’s coming round tomorrow so I’ll do her birthday present then. It’s a secret.

I’m not going to talk about politics, either here, or in the US. It’s a big old mess. An omnishambles, in fact. Too depressing.

 

Happy New Year!

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Small update.

Horrible two-week long virus involving very sore throat, cough, sinusitis and feeling awful finally gone. Now in M.E. type exhaustion and sleeping practically all the time. Improving.

Christmas Day was lovely. Went to YD, having fetched Mother, and YD’s brother-in-law and young family were there. Food was excellent, had a delightful time and all four children were just sweet.

Brighton and Southampton, where we went on 27th to visit family, were also a delight. Weather was surprisingly mild and sunny.

 

Bramber Castle
Brighton sea front

No knitting mojo at all. None. Nope.

Had various plans for this week – bit of baking, into Solihull for a bit of voucher-spending, library books back, charity shop – not happening. Not this week anyway.

Have decided not to beat myself up for being tired. Just roll with it and sleep a lot.

Ooh. Also. Started a new thing. Am only allowing myself the recommended daily allowance of sugar. 30 gms. Sounds a lot, but I discovered I was getting through at least twice that amount. I’m still able to have chocolate, but a fraction of what I was eating! Feels ok so far. Day four today.

November!

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Did my ironing this morning. All of it. Although I had to do it sitting down, as my stupid back is playing up. Painkillers, ice packs, phone call to osteopath tomorrow to see if I can bring forward the next appointment.

Had the leylandii at the back trimmed, and one of the leylandii hedges at the front cut down by half, so it’s just below the level of the roof of my car, which is an old Ford Ka. The other hedge at the front has been dug up and the stumps ground out. That was quite exciting to watch. Two men, fully kitted up in safety gear/helmets/goggles, with a large noisy machine, took approximately 10 minutes max! Now I just need to get as much of the thuggish ivy out of the soil as I can, weedkiller the rest, and see how it is next spring before I plant some more Photinia Red Robin, to match the little hedge at the front, parallel to the house.

Meanwhile, hubby decided to pollard the willow tree himself. Yes, himself. Worked, hard, all morning, up and down ladders with a saw, despite my bleating about stopping now, and did it all. Cut up the twiggy bits and fitted them all into the green wheelie bin. But he then had (heart) “symptoms”  for three days. I was very worried and a bit cross. It is frustrating not to be able to do the stuff you used to do easily. It is. But still. I’ve had years to come to terms with it (slipped a disc 43 years ago) so I do know how difficult and limiting it is. But harrumph. And of course he’s fine now.

Wasn’t able to knit for a couple of weeks – arthritis in my hands. But I’m ok now and nearly finished the Festival shawl (dark grey Gossypium and white/cream Paradou). It’s lovely and easy enough to knit (though not while I’m watching subtitled Swedish programmes!) and I will be pleased with it when it’s done. Next up, Whelk vest top for hubby, in pale grey Rowan yarn. Need to do a sample tension square, because the pattern is for DK, and the yarn I have is worsted. Not much difference, but enough to check first. Also need to check I’m ok with the pattern . . . . .

Have treated myself, after watching Black Earth Rising, to a cuff earring with two chains attached to a small stud. The heroine of said programme wore one, and looked stunning. I won’t look anything like her, of course, she’s about 6 ft tall, black, muscular and slim. Ah well. I do like it though. Hubby thinks it’s weird. Don’t care.

Christmas – presents all done. Not wrapped yet though. And I need to get my act together with regard to cooking. Planning a Yule Log, so need to practise with an ordinary Swiss Roll (tomorrow). Also need to do a carrot cake and a bakewell raspberry slice. And some mince pies (bought pastry, bought mincemeat, just need to put them together . . .)


This and that.

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I did my ironing today. Nothing remarkable about that, you might think. However, there didn’t seem to be very much. I have promised myself I won’t leave it longer than one week, or else it just piles up so much I can’t face it. But there were four tops and one pair of trousers. Hmm. Odd, I thought. When I packed everything away, I’d dropped a serviette, so thought I’d do that next time. As I popped it into the basket in the utility room, I saw the rest of my ironing. Yeah. What a doofus. Ah well. I did half of my ironing today.

Also re-made the home-made sleep masks, as they were too tight and crunched my ears. That was quite satisfying.

Waiting for quotes for leylandii trimming, willow tree polling and a further leylandii hedge (full of ivy, tree saplings and generally a pain to maintain) digging up at the front (to be replaced with a photinia Red Robin hedge).

Very windy and rainy today. Apparently it’s storm Callum. What a ridiculous name for a storm. It’s like calling it Colin, or Henry, or something nice and kind. Ho hum.

Knitting is going ok. All the Christmas stuff is done (not doing very much Christmas knitting this year, it can be too stressful). Here’s a couple of gnomes, aka wizards. Am now doing myself a “mistake rib” scarf in coral coloured cotton. Mm. Easy to do and looks quite complicated. That’s my kind of knitting. Also here’s a photo of the puffin I knitted.

 

Had my flu jab on Monday. Sore arm is all, much better than the flu. Also need blood test for potential polymyalgia, but will do that next week so that the results are not skewed by the flu jab.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Have any of you heard of Lillian Bilocca? I’m ashamed to say I hadn’t until I watched the tv programme with Maxine Peake. She was a brave, difficult woman, who managed to get enough support to make trawlermen’s lives at sea much safer 50 years ago. Here‘s a link to her Wikipedia page. I feel so sad that she had such a dreadful time after she’d achieved her aims (working radio on board, qualified radio operator, full crew on every trawler, proper training for crew, and mother-ship with medical supplies and staff on board). Good for her, say I. The zeitgeist at the time was testosterone-fuelled machismo, domestic violence was the norm, and women didn’t “interfere” with men’s work. Until 58 men in 3 trawlers were lost at sea in a matter of weeks, one January and February. Then Lillian (Big Lil) did interfere. Mm. And made a huge difference. Trawlermen were safer, presumably insurers didn’t have to pay out so much, so often, and the owners , despite the extra expense involved in the “charter”, were better off too (I assume).